As a little extra to this nightmare, this time at the nudist place you’ll be standing there butt naked. Oh the horror!
He might still take your lunch money though.
The Naked Chatty Guy
Some people don’t like the Naked Chatty Guy because he often acts as if the beach is his own. But then again he’s always the person who will make sure that everything runs smoothly and that everyone is having a good time.
Making nudist friends as a couple vs as a single
Tips for finding new naked friends
You could of course place yourself down on the nude beach or next to the swimming pool and wait for the Naked Chatty Guy to show up, but here are some other tips that will make it a lot easier to meet fellow nudists:
✅ Go over for a chat: Yep, simple as that. Small talk often works well at a nudist place and a simple introduction like “Hi, I’m Lins and it’s my first time at this place” can often result in a long conversation. Just make sure to pick a good moment. When people are busy putting up a tent or having a nap is often not such a moment.
✅ Ask for something: If you’re not that good in small talk, you could always ask a question. “Where are the toilets?”, “What time does the bar open” or “Who’s the Naked Chatty Guy in this place?” are all good openers.
✅ Join sports games: Nothing better to make new friends than to have them in your team. Check for any sports games that are happening and ask if you may join. Volleyball and petanque are very common at nude beaches and nudist resorts and some resorts offer lots of other sports options. Try to be honest about your league. If you say you’re a beginner at basketball and then slam dunk like Michael Jordan people may not immediately like you. Or vice versa.
✅ Sing karaoke: There are only two places in the world were karaoke is still a big thing: Asia and nudist resorts (interestingly, we’ve never seen karaoke in a nudist resort in Asia). Joining a karaoke evening is a great way to meet new people. It doesn’t really matter if you can sing or not. In fact, we’re both horrible singers and one time after a little too many cocktails we decided to sing “Hotel California” by the Eagles. We hadn’t really considered the 2 minute guitar solo in that song though and we can now tell you: 2 minutes of nude air guitar is very long! The good thing was that everybody had laughed their ass off and congratulated us afterwards.
✅ Join group dinners: Many nude resorts, especially the smaller ones, often organise a nude lunch or dinner. For them it’s a great way to get the group together and for you it’s an even better way to meet new people. When we celebrated Christmas Eve in El Refugio last year there was a Japanese guy at our table who spoke little to no English. And yet we had (some kind of) a conversation.
Tips for making everyone think you’re a creep
Some people are just better at striking up a conversation than others. We met a guy on a nude beach the other day who after his first visit already knew the names of the bartender, the guy who sells sun beds, the lifeguards, the massage lady and half of the other people on the beach. It’s something we’re envious of. If you’re not that smooth talking or if you want to be left alone and make sure that even the Naked Chatty Guy doesn’t come over, here are some tips for how not to make new friends:
✅ Be very pushy: Walk straight into someone’s comfort zone, stand very close to them, invite yourself into their tent, get a beer out of their fridge and say “Hey, I forgot my towel, you don’t mind if I place my sweaty butt on yours, do you?”
✅ Lots of awkward staring: Pick out your new best friend on the nude beach and just start staring at him. When he looks your way, you nod. The second time he looks, you wink. And when he looks more times you just smile in a creepy way.
✅ Take photos of others: Walk around with your phone in your hand and take photos of the scenery. Ask random nudists to pose for you. When people walk past you, you just follow them with your camera. This works like a charm, within minutes the whole place will think you’re a creep.
✅ Say lots of sexist things: That game of basketball is the perfect place to do so. “Not bad for a woman” is a classic, “Be a good girl and get me a beer” also works great. Others include “I hope you have the brains because you sure don’t have the balls” and “You’re probably single, right?”.
✅ Talk about other’s physical appearance: “You look great naked”, “your dick looks like the one of my ex”, “I love the way your boobs move when you throw a ball”, “I didn’t think you were that chubby”, “Wow guys, look at that girl’s butt!”, we can go on and on like this.
|Naked Wanderings’ Complete Guide for the First Time Nudist ebook|
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15 thoughts on “How to Make Nudist Friends”
Funny but also true. Great tips
Thank you for your explanation
I think what you should emphasize but haven’t really mentioned is that if you’re a man on his own, you should expect to meet others like yourself. Don’t be pestering women or couples–you’ll end up in trouble! But finding other guys to talk to is entirely reasonable (no assumptions that anyone is or isn’t gay). If it’s a resort, you could start by asking at the office when you check in, “Is there a group of men here who’d welcome a newcomer?” or “Is there anyone here that you’d recommend to talk to about this place, or naturism generally?”
Hopefully they’d link you up with someone who’d enhance your visit, and not point you at the Naked Chatty Guy!
Thanks for this comment John. We agree with you in a way but certainly not 100%. For the simple reason that we (a couple) have already met quite some single men at nudist places and we also don’t mind when a man starts talking to us. We don’t really make a difference.
But we do agree that there is some kind of subtle barrier. Some things are more accepted from a couple than from a single, dirty jokes for example 🙂
Greatest typo ever: „butt naked“
Isn’t that the right way to spell it?
Our problem is we are family nudists. We find that a lot of people do not like kids at the pool. We would like to meet other family nudists and our child hangs around us. We are also older parents and get confused as grandparents. We are also AANR members.
A good rule of thumb: Never, ever take anyone s photo without their permission. This goes for all tourist destinations from nude beaches to theme parks to UNESCO World Heritage sites but it s especially true when the subject of your photo is naked. Always ask explicitly if you may take a photo and make sure photography is even allowed where you are. (Many nudist beaches prohibit it.)
We found one of the ways we’ve meet people was to go to venues other than beaches. Clubs in particular are good for this as they will ‘check you out’ and introduce you to their members. Sort of like chatty guy on steroids.
The other place we’ve made friends with are the nude cruises we’ve done, we now travel the world catching up.
The one thing that I’m not 100% sure I agree with is that it is made more difficult by the nudity aspect. Here’s an example. Go to your local park, leaving your dog at home, now make friends.
See how easy that wasn’t.
Ok so now think of a hobby or interest you have and go to a venue, in my case an amateur radio club, and say g’day.
See how much simpler that was.
Just as turning up at an amateur radio club automatically announces a shared interest turning up at a nudist venue similarly announces a similar value. This is the ice breaker that helps more than anything else.
How do I join
correct me if i’m wrong but i think what pornography is, is a personal choice, for example some people think naked people doing sexual things is porn, and some people just think naked people is porn. —- am i correct in what i say?
Why are definitely right! Porn is in the eye of the observer. Some people think that breastfeeding is sexual…